tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13359498295687460132024-02-06T20:47:15.585-07:00Life's AdrenalineMy life is sports, enjoying the rush of pushing buttons and testing gravity. This is another blog of boasting, blushing, and being freaking beautiful. This is my life's adrenaline.Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.comBlogger79125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-36415383753246292522015-08-05T23:49:00.003-06:002015-08-05T23:49:59.653-06:00In the ER it is always Hammer time!!!We had a baby boy and everything was hunky dory for the first few days, but then Megan started to develop a bad pain in her back. The pain just kept getting worse and worse and then she started to get really nauseous. She took her Motrin and Tylenol to no avail. <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgb1K4Y79_bfXzaxNQCpAZLlfy8ZDgY6v8wmi4C0lPfyWDzJTtKKOamdHAeEvsuE-152yoPv091vwp66G7t2g1wVcmI9CH9ZaEG3wUo7I3jIzMm3YV6RH9tRRQ6A4ZTGNVgh9T5_II1jU/s1600/kirk-prune-juice-kirk-needs-prune-juice-ftw-demotivational-poster-1288499084.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgb1K4Y79_bfXzaxNQCpAZLlfy8ZDgY6v8wmi4C0lPfyWDzJTtKKOamdHAeEvsuE-152yoPv091vwp66G7t2g1wVcmI9CH9ZaEG3wUo7I3jIzMm3YV6RH9tRRQ6A4ZTGNVgh9T5_II1jU/s1600/kirk-prune-juice-kirk-needs-prune-juice-ftw-demotivational-poster-1288499084.jpg" height="160" width="200" /></a></div>
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We called the nurse on the emergency line and she went through the symptoms with us. We first thought it was constipation and so a friend kindly bought us some and Megan drank a bunch warm which was awful. If you have never tried prune juice then imagine grape juice mixed with sour milk. I didn't try it myself because I didn't want any Hersheys syrup myself, but that is how I imagine it tasting after seeing Megan's face. She drank a whole cup of it like a champ. A little while later we found out that constipation wasn't the problem and so now we have a bottle of prune juice in our fridge that we wont drink. We called the nurse back and she thought it might be the epidural damage she had causing the pain or kidney junk. She told us to go to the ER. <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimi9O2c5BtHbOUgVekI0nm4KAIl4BQrZwgVPv-VW6O1OtxpZMuGqH_pLsJqcc7JNDH7x51GesG6efZmJnf71jy31fPGvXz7vS1M6YbrPpgzsDcA42Q0yK2bUbHM6TIWmoIQKKxcF4jBG2L/s1600/funny-nurses-laughing-hospital.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimi9O2c5BtHbOUgVekI0nm4KAIl4BQrZwgVPv-VW6O1OtxpZMuGqH_pLsJqcc7JNDH7x51GesG6efZmJnf71jy31fPGvXz7vS1M6YbrPpgzsDcA42Q0yK2bUbHM6TIWmoIQKKxcF4jBG2L/s1600/funny-nurses-laughing-hospital.jpg" height="212" width="320" /></a></div>
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I hate the ER but we went and checked into the expensive "bed and no breakfast". We checked in at 12 and we were there till 3. In that time we had a bunch of test run on her. The ER doctor was a medium height male doctor with MC Hammer scrub pants and a doctors coat that would fit a 400 lbs man, and bright blue Adidas shoes that. He was the strangest doctor I may ever meet, but he told Megan that she had nothing life threatening and then wrote a prescription for some solid pain meds and anti-nausea medicine. They told her she probably just has muscular skeletal pain, which is a way of saying she has a sore back, which we both already diagnosed easily before going to the ER. <div>
We got home and for the next 2 days Megan was in tons of pain and feeling way sick. We talked to her pharmacist sister who helped give suggestions about how to tailor her medicine in a way that would help her with her migraines, pain, and stomach. Finally she is doing better thanks to the meds from Dr. Strange and the help of a smart sister. Megan is now healthy and back to normal.</div>
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<a href="http://www.seducingwithstyle.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/passe-hammer-pants.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://www.seducingwithstyle.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/passe-hammer-pants.jpg" height="145" width="200" /></a><a href="http://ak-hdl.buzzfed.com/static/2014-05/30/15/enhanced/webdr07/enhanced-19328-1401479446-18.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://ak-hdl.buzzfed.com/static/2014-05/30/15/enhanced/webdr07/enhanced-19328-1401479446-18.jpg" height="320" width="210" /></a>On a happy note I thought i would share my MC Hammer pants story. So I was in elementary school when parachute pants were popular for the older kids. My mom upon my brother Adam's request had made him a pair of parachute pants. I always wanted to be like Adam and so my mom kindly made me some. I was so excited to go to school and be the coolest kid around. I think I imagined everyone coming up to me and wanting to be my friend, and then going home and buying some for themselves. So i put on my very very baggy MC Hammer pants with a crazy fabric choice and I went to school. I didn't get the reaction I had anticipated, and in fact no one really said anything about them till recess. At recess a kid I was good friends with came up to me with a concerned look on his face and asked me why I was wearing Aladdin pants. I found out that his interpretation of my apparel was shared with about everyone. I never wore the pants again in public and instead they became my pajamas. I learned that age does matter when it comes to the things we wear!</div>
brettbeutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06371708640438835170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-24785362584745210092015-08-05T23:03:00.002-06:002015-08-05T23:03:35.593-06:00Postpartum Pains<a href="http://www.instituteofman.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/checking_diaper.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://www.instituteofman.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/checking_diaper.jpg" height="200" width="200" /></a>So postpartum stands for post birth and is not some treaty signed after a war, unless you want to consider pregnancy a war and life after birth the treaty. After a baby is born you are stuck in a hospital for two days not sleeping and you are trying hard to figure out the parent thing. I learned how to not put on a diaper backward, how to clean up the black tar that babies first poop, how to help your wife breastfeed a wild flailing baby, and how to try and get a baby to not cry. All these things I halfway learned in to hospital when times were easy. P.S. that breastfeeding thing looks like the most difficult thing ever and I am so glad I don't have to have a kid bite on my nipples for hours everyday. <br />
I give my wife the biggest props for sticking with it and never giving up. In the hospital we had lots of friends come visit and family. It was a terrific time! We also got a stake and shrimp meal as a reward for having a baby in the hospital and for paying them tons of money. The meal was delicious even hours later when we finally got to eat it because the baby wanted to eat first.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGTuzb8wB6sF1o7gQK-BU3L9uRQXVsmntFEH_7BX13SgHKgGlYty2WYCOmRQnhjbevYhmflc-LK2jTsNVASuit50eZe4pGPc64FQVo2Tmw9Ahouok0xdqubw0FVYAfo3N6NoqTFJSft1Q/s1600/IMG_20150728_144258596.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGTuzb8wB6sF1o7gQK-BU3L9uRQXVsmntFEH_7BX13SgHKgGlYty2WYCOmRQnhjbevYhmflc-LK2jTsNVASuit50eZe4pGPc64FQVo2Tmw9Ahouok0xdqubw0FVYAfo3N6NoqTFJSft1Q/s320/IMG_20150728_144258596.jpg" width="180" /></a></div>
<a href="http://25.media.tumblr.com/1ab38af3ea70d90ff561a49e3638a862/tumblr_n3av8sMfzF1ro2ehjo1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/1ab38af3ea70d90ff561a49e3638a862/tumblr_n3av8sMfzF1ro2ehjo1_500.jpg" height="320" width="214" /></a>Eventually we got to leave the hospital and feel the sun on our faces again. The hospital is like being stuck in English class for days and then when you leave it is like going to recess finally. We dressed Grant up super cute so we could take a picture and so it we ran into someone in the parking lot that we knew then they could see how cuddly and cute our baby was. I figured out the car seat thing which was more difficult than it should have been and we were on our 2 mile drive home. I seriously drove like and 90 year old with a gimp leg and cataracts. In those 2 miles I finally came to understand the baby on board bumper sticker. The sticker is a way to say, "I am driving super slow because I don't know how to drive with a baby in my car and so please don't run me off the road for driving so bad." People probably thought I had installed a moped engine in my Camry because of how slow I accelerated and stopped. We did make it home without getting honked at or noticing anyone giving us the bird (calling it the bird makes it sound so harmless). We then set up out pack-n-play in our room for the baby to sleep in. I wish now that I had followed the instructions. We had our baby sleep in a part of the pack and play that seemed a bit odd and had a tilt, so the baby kept sliding to the bottom. I kept thinking how bad the design was for a baby to sleep in this little tilted trough. So I read the directions. After 7 days and finally reading the instructions I discovered that the changing table on the pack-n-play was not meant to be a very good bed, but the bassinet that was put together wrong would make a much better bed. So after 7 days at home, Grant finally got to sleep somewhere other then a changing table. Me and Megan are still laughing about that one.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">See if you can spot the changing table!!!</td></tr>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnmetOhSaaYmDUW02LhIPoPIyytukI6pyANE8Vz_MRF01JwV8zCaDBvHYw_Wil186S5mbw-U1MW7pkfHkAkmihujFBPOJiub8lPzWJPNSSp4SBgJXXuXe8xAEvAwhKUfAeFS0zFiCfHqk/s1600/IMG_20150803_173922156.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnmetOhSaaYmDUW02LhIPoPIyytukI6pyANE8Vz_MRF01JwV8zCaDBvHYw_Wil186S5mbw-U1MW7pkfHkAkmihujFBPOJiub8lPzWJPNSSp4SBgJXXuXe8xAEvAwhKUfAeFS0zFiCfHqk/s320/IMG_20150803_173922156.jpg" width="320" /></a>So Megan and I started the difficult journey of taking care of a newborn baby with jaundice. It has been the most tiring and yet rewarding experience of my life. I tried to help Megan as much as I could at night, but sometimes she was unable to wake me. We employed the help of Megan's mom during the day to wash all the bottles, breast pump parts, and soiled clothing. She worked so hard and we would be in a home similar to some hoarders houses if she hadn't helped. I tried to help when I could, and I was able to help a lot, but if i sat down I would fall asleep. I fell asleep countless times with the baby in my arms bottle feeding or while helping Megan. I didn't feel to bad about it though, because Megan would also fall asleep breast feeding and eating. It was the hardest time of my life, but thanks to Megan being so amazing, we made it. So now we are caring for Grant solo now and we are doing great minus the 3 times a day when he starts crying and we can't diagnose the cause. I do want to say that being a dad is the best thing in the world as long as you have an amazing wife at your side to do it with. #Ilovemylifebrettbeutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06371708640438835170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-57021472421611274622015-08-05T22:15:00.001-06:002015-08-05T23:54:55.308-06:00I am a Baby Dada!!!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9S0bgcBuWbjPnDTJQMqSwGOHqw-LO8iIxVMl2XR_whsOyjkHPEXYZnI5l4s5vlk_j86M1GnqC7BGqvCHfGgKkUgMEmzJH1_qRZtitmTpaXV8iDk9uVOlKfXpWkKO00vRraGs_Q97CSOw/s1600/IMG_20150726_192044750.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9S0bgcBuWbjPnDTJQMqSwGOHqw-LO8iIxVMl2XR_whsOyjkHPEXYZnI5l4s5vlk_j86M1GnqC7BGqvCHfGgKkUgMEmzJH1_qRZtitmTpaXV8iDk9uVOlKfXpWkKO00vRraGs_Q97CSOw/s320/IMG_20150726_192044750.jpg" width="320" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi38hPWe5ZJbBztzsnGZIADC1hd3UAzM4-gVVNpHuDVL3fxyNUhgZ7kCuq-IjsLI8qyX1buRoAu5ET9YwLQ7n3yBAvZhb_R2AWnYwGG4y8hYOfqzUcQ_ov1JN-S06JRSwEmaGw95PnuCUk/s1600/IMG_20150726_200442828.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi38hPWe5ZJbBztzsnGZIADC1hd3UAzM4-gVVNpHuDVL3fxyNUhgZ7kCuq-IjsLI8qyX1buRoAu5ET9YwLQ7n3yBAvZhb_R2AWnYwGG4y8hYOfqzUcQ_ov1JN-S06JRSwEmaGw95PnuCUk/s320/IMG_20150726_200442828.jpg" width="180" /></a>So I am now a dad!!! On July 26th, 2015 my wife with my help had a baby boy at 7:15pm. He came into the world as purple as a Umpa Lumpa and pretty cute for having just been squeezed like a Go-gurt for 4 hours or something. However his body quickly changed into the cutest boy ever (take that Prince George of Cambridge) and it he doesn't even require suspenders to be as cute as he is (take that Prince George of Cambridge). I may be developing as of late a weird sense of competition with that prince kid.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjYS3FwcX89_nmPj9V9u-1TGw_Is8XrmCD00D2zCSBv6hKZaa7-4wDLJccqA1OWXiaiUHtUEqOATGrnCsjiFs3lZ0ajy8vUonAxCf5mCI7obeLRPZiWrDS45owpVJL8veqKTZWlwrp9LI/s1600/IMG_20150726_204333793.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="112" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjYS3FwcX89_nmPj9V9u-1TGw_Is8XrmCD00D2zCSBv6hKZaa7-4wDLJccqA1OWXiaiUHtUEqOATGrnCsjiFs3lZ0ajy8vUonAxCf5mCI7obeLRPZiWrDS45owpVJL8veqKTZWlwrp9LI/s200/IMG_20150726_204333793.jpg" width="200" /></a>My kid came into the world weighing 8lbs 15oz and measuring 22" long. Before I had a baby I had no clue what the significance was, but I hear that means that I have a really long and large child. He also has giant hands and giant feet which are already playing in his favor as a bball pro. He has a 6'5" father and a 6' mother and so I think he will be a pretty tall chap. If you want to begin sponsorship now then I will be much obliged and then you will be doctored in as a sponsor early.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">just an example pee stick</td></tr>
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So the whole baby thing started when my wife texted me a picture of a pee stick. I wanted to tell her not to take those out of the trash, but I had an incline that she had peed on it. Turn out she had peed on it and then I had to go research to learn the difference between a line and a plus. Turns out that a plus sign means you are a baby dada. So the journey along my wife and her fun pregnancy adventures began. She loved corn dogs during her pregnancy and I was totally ok eating a breaded pig on a stick. She had a good pregnancy minus a stomach flu that we both got. I think it turned us both inside out a few times when we were throwing up, but luckily that passed. As her due date approached and then passed, we began to discuss means of trying to induce pregnancy by 4-wheeling, jumping on a tramp, running, belly flops off the dock, and many more. Grant Tell decided he wanted to come sunday the 26th and so poked my wife's bubble so hard that it popped and all this "water" came out. He popped the "balloon" around 2:00 am and it took us till 2:30 to wrap our heads around the fact that after 9 months the baby was coming. So we went to the hospital and checked in.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgknWMKqz05X80C9tO8pfmeVqGlCOp90NMwyPbHViHcfuriMGYQ1F5sYJfShkgNNceL2IUfetbAo1dOgTCZHH2AgNidm0y4r2lzdc2Zq4E4yO5-JN0AHEGXbGsOKP_CoqWr_ZVUFyUGvmg/s1600/IMG_20150727_122153222.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgknWMKqz05X80C9tO8pfmeVqGlCOp90NMwyPbHViHcfuriMGYQ1F5sYJfShkgNNceL2IUfetbAo1dOgTCZHH2AgNidm0y4r2lzdc2Zq4E4yO5-JN0AHEGXbGsOKP_CoqWr_ZVUFyUGvmg/s320/IMG_20150727_122153222.jpg" width="180" /></a>Now we will fast forward like 10 min to when Megan was in her breezy hospital gown that should have moons printed on it so that it distracts from the full moon in the back. As a side note, some weird guy who had no tailoring skills designed those dumb things. Anyways so Megan is on the bed and she is barely dilated and so the nurses start her on protosin, which is one of the few drugs that causes more pain rather than less pain. So her contractions get amped up by this crazy drug and now she is in tons of pain. So for those of you who don't know my wife, she really likes being tough and so she decides to play a game where she sees how long she can stand the pain before getting an epidural. She waited a good little while, but after getting that tube inserted into her spine with the special juice, she was so relieved. I got really worried she would fall in love with the nurse who gave her the epidural, because she thought he saved her life. She just kept telling me how awesome it was and how she couldn't feel anything. I watched as he installed the tube using a sophisticated capri sun straw and a little tube. After that we sat there most the day waiting for progress and it came in tiny tiny amounts. When she got fully dilated they started the pushing. If you want details on the next part you can watch a youtube video, or ask me about it in a room with no windows. It was a neat experience and watching my baby emerge was an unforgettable experience. I got to cut the cord, which is more of a gnawing through thing then a quick snip. Then Grant was in my wife's arms. We haven't stopped staring at him since. We had lots of visitors who were so kind and generous even if they all pointed out his big hands and feet. I had big ears though and I grew into them as far as I can tell in the mirror and so he should be fine. He is seriously the cutest and most adorable kid. I love him so much already. It is now 11 days later and we are still exhausted. I want to keep this to a short story and not make it into a novel and so goodbye.<br />
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brettbeutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06371708640438835170noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-62307110210623398132013-03-21T16:06:00.000-06:002013-03-21T16:06:12.615-06:00Touched & Touched and I Didn't Like it!!!So as you can tell by the title today i was touched. However not emotionally yet (day isnt over yet), just physically. Once on the outside and once on the inside. This riddle better end here before people's imaginations run too far.<br />
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I just have to add before i go on that this is a blog worthy day!!!<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5YvvICt_jt_YpWPdbB-SwbRsf38uFlpPsaC1PmRJGOqxbrNSxtkhypWs2sCFBPSzA4lcGapD0OrqAWfCqPpzVZiEb1RofVxtpZYkHZlTNp-qf9X-hLSnCkJO1XBkEHjpqjVLQb7fbZaP_/s1600/crave+those.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="117" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5YvvICt_jt_YpWPdbB-SwbRsf38uFlpPsaC1PmRJGOqxbrNSxtkhypWs2sCFBPSzA4lcGapD0OrqAWfCqPpzVZiEb1RofVxtpZYkHZlTNp-qf9X-hLSnCkJO1XBkEHjpqjVLQb7fbZaP_/s320/crave+those.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">True!!!</td></tr>
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<b>The First Touch</b>= First thing this morning i was REALLY tired and i went down to get my munch on before i got my school day on. So i pull out my usual tasty "Cinnamon Toast Crunch" and of course a bowl, spoon, and milk since i am not some weirdo that eats it any other way. No offense mom (she puts ice cubes in her skim milk to make it cold and to water down the skim milk even more. It is almost like she grew up in great depression times where you watered everything down to make it last.). So my "Cinnamon Toast Crunch" as i was saying got put in my bowl i ate my whole first bowl and noticed something black in my milk. I had eaten a whole bowl and say several bigger black spots, but i brushed it aside assuming it to be cinnamon clumps. I picked out the last black speck and at a closer peak it was a little black ant.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0VsEppNilELDLdJS5Ngznf4yoGZChPZCE0xl-6kR944RL2pI1bir6A9UvAL_F1ylnGj0KvKnJtI3VAD23ULaRYpd-WChsGg0a3VKsyhfSmQAI6QnfIt5D5wnLe95wtgX9ui4Q9Qjvi6pB/s1600/ants+in+cereal.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0VsEppNilELDLdJS5Ngznf4yoGZChPZCE0xl-6kR944RL2pI1bir6A9UvAL_F1ylnGj0KvKnJtI3VAD23ULaRYpd-WChsGg0a3VKsyhfSmQAI6QnfIt5D5wnLe95wtgX9ui4Q9Qjvi6pB/s1600/ants+in+cereal.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">can you see the little guy?</td></tr>
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I remembered that the last few days we had had an ant problem. We had next to me some ant traps to kill them. We had to throw away a stick of butter because they were all over it (they would have died from cholesterol anyways). Then 2 days later we had to throw some other food away that they had gotten to over night. So it dawned on me that is was those ants.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGIOo8fME33RmM_XwRwcyisraJx2dzEd9zSlujDNANlpdlo6jj7aLfk9qMvDshu-tzHQ-tdHcS785OnNgIXwFfKEjyXOJBy0ygGn3-bQVKiLCV353yU-3iSrUMU8RE5lY9ZjGrT15wVGPt/s1600/Ants+on+a+Log+1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="199" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGIOo8fME33RmM_XwRwcyisraJx2dzEd9zSlujDNANlpdlo6jj7aLfk9qMvDshu-tzHQ-tdHcS785OnNgIXwFfKEjyXOJBy0ygGn3-bQVKiLCV353yU-3iSrUMU8RE5lY9ZjGrT15wVGPt/s200/Ants+on+a+Log+1.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">These ants are tasty minus the celery</td></tr>
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The butter sat on the counter next to the bowls. So i brushed off the fact i had eaten ants and blamed it on not checking my bowl for ants before pouring cereal. So i poured another bowl and had mild poured and noticed those dang ants again. I was so mad. I hate wasting food more than anything. I looked in the box and they were a ton in there. Curse those ants. But i had poured a bowl and so i ate it all anyways and every time i had an ant on my spoon i would eat it aggressively to teach them a lesson. Each box has 1g of protein in it and i boosted it to 2. I also shook the box hard and i think i killed the rest. I kill ants that upset me, not aunts i love them. <u>No like ants; like aunts</u> (covered that).<br />
So i had ants touch my insides! Then i took the box and put a note on the cupboard that said "beware ants in cereals!". My mom just told me though that she didn't find any in any of the other cereals:-(.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVNUOsyEfw8Te160_0xKJUlCjAD9scd8bJf571RZAkE9IaRZg1N0-grfOKHDLg-shP9zhz1vYqBhLMSvF9CU9vrNmNQLfumv3x35NihVsP_OyKmBHAmfTbqPlvRRMofYNohzPNAIafIaV7/s1600/grab+leg.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="238" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVNUOsyEfw8Te160_0xKJUlCjAD9scd8bJf571RZAkE9IaRZg1N0-grfOKHDLg-shP9zhz1vYqBhLMSvF9CU9vrNmNQLfumv3x35NihVsP_OyKmBHAmfTbqPlvRRMofYNohzPNAIafIaV7/s320/grab+leg.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">What I think he was thinking! :-(</td></tr>
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<b>The Second Touch</b>= I went to school. In Ochem my first class i got there early and sat down. This obnoxious gay kid (gay to be taken both ways, but not the happy gay even though he was happy today) and sat right in front of me. He then turns and begins to tell the girl next to me about his date with this guy and how it is his second date with him, and how the guy kissed him goodnight and likes cars which he said made him more attractive and on and on. Sorry for venting. Anyways in the middle of class he reaches back for his coat i assume and misses in and grabs my pants instead. I was lounging out since i was getting sleepy. When he felt my jean's fabric it must have felt wrong an so he re-grabbed it a could times and then grabbed my leg. Then we turned around and said "oh sorry", smiled and then his attention went back to the teacher.<br />
That was my second touch.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiot6_vUmrEaM5GoqlHG9sxcMxA2oK36PdMfL8vFJorMc7y932_C7xw_bJOn5oFq3aGQEa4ipPhRRvnPCxfvNmvr9GGbTPd1j8aJNfEgPMEvViWUtB6VSwx0M-pFPKUV1VPjPwxpy6OjQuA/s1600/lightrail608.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="131" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiot6_vUmrEaM5GoqlHG9sxcMxA2oK36PdMfL8vFJorMc7y932_C7xw_bJOn5oFq3aGQEa4ipPhRRvnPCxfvNmvr9GGbTPd1j8aJNfEgPMEvViWUtB6VSwx0M-pFPKUV1VPjPwxpy6OjQuA/s200/lightrail608.JPG" width="200" /></a>Touching in general is nice if you expect it and if it is from people you want. I have to ride the light rail every day and i get touched by strangers too much. They cuddle up to you on the bench that is already to small. Today there were benches open all over the train and this lady insists on sitting right in my leg space. Then she kept touching my feet with hers. Play footsie somewhere else. I wanted to say that, but instead i just kept trying to curl up more and more until i was almost inside and out. So today was a touchy touchy day.<br />
For more blogs post like these tune in yearly.Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-50896485414589891472013-02-24T15:19:00.001-07:002013-02-24T15:19:52.955-07:00Miss Me?So i have never been good at multi-tasking. I tried once to eat cereal while driving to work and i got milk spilled on me every time i turned the wheel. I try to talk at text amounting in the same kind of disaster. While others like Luke my best friend growing up can read novels while driving. He drives more with his knees than with his hands. The coolest thing i can do while driving is change shorts and tie my shoes. <div>
This is significant because I have now been dating Megan for 9 months; and blogging and dating are hard to multi-task together. I just plain struggle with it and so if this is a lame post then just think how milk is spilling all over me while i write.</div>
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Well today is a snow day from church. They canceled church because of snow and that allowed me to have time to write. However this is as long as this is going to be, because i am going to go make a snowman. Boo ya</div>
Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-72405035856013182082012-06-21T16:40:00.000-06:002012-06-21T16:40:16.625-06:00Excalibur i.e. not the sword in the stone!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilSEag4vz_kM10e_v6d3OTTb3X6VJ9VmCPkW65LudYoWX_fCGM2mM8VhTetplqRXFni4EzS5lZZJ9WcgEv_p69UpR9VWyU8FqkLZn0rBLyZj4yuEU7k_lRqK4gxLaTNyNwwhMnIvnxwu4B/s1600/6842551.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="179" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilSEag4vz_kM10e_v6d3OTTb3X6VJ9VmCPkW65LudYoWX_fCGM2mM8VhTetplqRXFni4EzS5lZZJ9WcgEv_p69UpR9VWyU8FqkLZn0rBLyZj4yuEU7k_lRqK4gxLaTNyNwwhMnIvnxwu4B/s320/6842551.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
So I was thinking about Merlin and King Arthur the other day and thought i should clarify some things. So King Arthur did not pull Excalibur out of a stone. The sword in the stone is totally different than the magic sword Excalibur. The sword in the stone just proved King Arthur's lineage. Excalibur King Arthur got from the Lady in the Lake who got it from Merlin who asked a dragon to forge it for him. However the dragon said he would only do it if King Arthur wielded it. <a href="http://merlin.wikia.com/wiki/Excalibur_(Sword)">http://merlin.wikia.com/wiki/Excalibur_(Sword)</a> has details.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi21VEHU20T1CiQjkNyJ8bXN_7Ha3Z5u-WdWlnHioJ3-mcQDatmRhotbY0UMflRDhuNoKHiNbd_bdmU0wq7N-BDZYrKTb5bo43a9hV-VrOmiSyw01Iu0Gj03Kn26veSGmDpCJ95g9-qfucf/s1600/images+(1).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="195" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi21VEHU20T1CiQjkNyJ8bXN_7Ha3Z5u-WdWlnHioJ3-mcQDatmRhotbY0UMflRDhuNoKHiNbd_bdmU0wq7N-BDZYrKTb5bo43a9hV-VrOmiSyw01Iu0Gj03Kn26veSGmDpCJ95g9-qfucf/s200/images+(1).jpg" width="200" /></a><br />
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My main point in this thingy is to remove confusion and state that fact that I Brett could have also pulled the sword from the stone do to brute strength and a hardcoreness! Boo Ya!<br />
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Also I found a smurf wizard that is totally lazy, and one day at Goodwill I will find my own smurf wizard outfit and then I will be the coolest man on earth. Note also that fire red, army green, or purple popcorn are other acceptable wizard outfit colors.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj67CqU87yEx6e1U9AXUnGDvQmQaiaA_Mn9_xQsS0fTIER2R38IANoF99Fy-udAPeQ5bKt1s06zOtYwDl-7COJjbA8VVWTMNSCWu8DAKwlutsVmFC-P0IG42LvAPWOJpT4DHPKdh58K_hzj/s1600/images.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj67CqU87yEx6e1U9AXUnGDvQmQaiaA_Mn9_xQsS0fTIER2R38IANoF99Fy-udAPeQ5bKt1s06zOtYwDl-7COJjbA8VVWTMNSCWu8DAKwlutsVmFC-P0IG42LvAPWOJpT4DHPKdh58K_hzj/s1600/images.jpg" /></a></div>Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-45410882574344566822012-06-21T16:12:00.000-06:002012-06-21T16:14:16.541-06:00Hot, Hot, Hot.I meant to post this months ago, and it was just saved as a draft and so i am posting it now!<br />
Why do laptops get so hot. Mine sounds like that fan i use during the summer to cool me off, but yet my lap is way hot right now. Also i have no idea what to write about. But for a news update i broke off a piece of my tooth eating guacamole and then i keep sticking my tongue where my tooth should be and that has made my tongue raw. I am in a dilemma. Then I went and played vollyball with a group of the black kids on campus and found some to be amazing and some to be bad at it. Well nothing weird is coming to mind about food or girls or animals. Those are my three main subjects and so i will try again later.Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-35190455808929441742012-06-21T16:08:00.001-06:002012-06-21T16:12:19.584-06:00Being Whipped is Good!I am dating again finally! I never thought I would get back into it. I figured the last time I got my heart broken that I would never date seriously again. I did meet some amazing girls, but for one reason or another things didn't progress. I was getting comfortable with the idea of being single forever. I had this bitter side that would despise people who decided to get married. I would try and talk my close friends out of getting married, because I wanted a friend to be single with for the rest of my life. I once talked to my sister about us living in the same house at age 35 if we both were still single. She started and is still dating one of my friends and so that dream faded. However things have recently developed:-). I find myself completely into a girl who makes me feel like a newbie all over again. I get nervous about little things and blush all the time. I felt like I was a pro at the whole dating thing, but I have played every hand wrong and she still goes out with me. I eat my lucky charms every morning for breakfast and everyday things continue to get more awesome. I may eat lucky charms the rest of my life if it means I get to keep spending everyday in this awesome way. I lay and fray but may fall away into a bay of twitterpation and inside giggles. I couldn't understand why people dated, but now I am so happy doing it right now that i cant imagine life another way.<br />
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So now everyday consists of Dating my dream girl, working, eating, and sometimes sleeping! Life is just awesome right now. My friends and family I think avoid me, because all I talk about is her. Such is life!<br />
Also being whipped or totally into a girl is never a bad thing unless she is a <span style="background-color: white;">murderer or a </span><span style="background-color: white;">kleptomaniac or a red head(jk).</span></div>Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-85210561611789325842012-06-07T03:03:00.001-06:002012-06-07T14:23:43.412-06:00The Lake that swallowed my Car!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2HA0PWp8LluLNQFSx8OH6Bmvdn8GOWts-eUGZAqc6tKw_v6rgzYyw-83A2H_M5XUQD3qvXD8PN6Rm_J7ICTIlN92meQVnwKzVKQvQpK5QWyEUPOu1AOrVKn0zS-OlkYt-H_PdMIG37qnQ/s1600/IMG_0125.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2HA0PWp8LluLNQFSx8OH6Bmvdn8GOWts-eUGZAqc6tKw_v6rgzYyw-83A2H_M5XUQD3qvXD8PN6Rm_J7ICTIlN92meQVnwKzVKQvQpK5QWyEUPOu1AOrVKn0zS-OlkYt-H_PdMIG37qnQ/s320/IMG_0125.jpg" width="320" /></a>So tonight we had an insane thunderstorm with tons of rain and hail. I got home from my date and me and my roommates went to look at the nearby creek which had risen feet and had flooded a large area. So me and Ryan set out to find other creeks that may be flooded also. We did find some very flooded ones that were way cool.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgiwnm_WHiwbBqBto6bLrCvaRgh5Jj1pL4yMYPOIca8sviqPb4I0hyphenhyphenwjyYEAO40Pu7B0xFW9oRvNtxpZmGQw3MUom-hKUARyYAUbzIIlwMTFCu3SVjwRpTyMke9jusMd_XQySIwMHEy3la/s1600/IMG_0124.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgiwnm_WHiwbBqBto6bLrCvaRgh5Jj1pL4yMYPOIca8sviqPb4I0hyphenhyphenwjyYEAO40Pu7B0xFW9oRvNtxpZmGQw3MUom-hKUARyYAUbzIIlwMTFCu3SVjwRpTyMke9jusMd_XQySIwMHEy3la/s320/IMG_0124.jpg" width="320" /></a>On the way back home from our flood hunt past 1am I thought we could drive though the Kings Soopers parking lot near our house. I had heard the puddles got big in there. So I drive in and see a very large puddle that seemed to cover most of the parking lot. I drove for the center of it flooring the gas peddle. We hit the puddle going fast, but the water also got really deep fast. My car slowed down immediately and i watched as the water rose up to meet me. My car then started to spudder and then it died. It all happened so fast. I looked over at Ryan and our faces went from panic to laughter. We both burst out laughing! The water was up to the doors, and i kept checking to see if any was leaking in. So we looked out and there we were in the middle of a lake up to our doors in water, in the deepest part. Floating on the water is big sheets of hail. So there we were stranded laughing our heads off. I am still laughing at how stupid i was. So after we got over laughing too hard we called Ryan's brother nate to come get us. We figured we would have to jump out the window and wade through the icy water that was up past our knees to get out. So we told nate to bring towels and come to our rescue.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWjwAkO3U2KJ_OzAZFeIPiXYUTe7MlvqH_rF56kW6qSHfItdZr68wBz6ci1LivBf_G1fzUzEQl5kwt_V30maPYc8oonhyphenhyphenvaO8RzEanBGY6c2x2iAvwfsW-Kg8CdbqA-sysgIteGuQb5t17/s1600/IMG_0122.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWjwAkO3U2KJ_OzAZFeIPiXYUTe7MlvqH_rF56kW6qSHfItdZr68wBz6ci1LivBf_G1fzUzEQl5kwt_V30maPYc8oonhyphenhyphenvaO8RzEanBGY6c2x2iAvwfsW-Kg8CdbqA-sysgIteGuQb5t17/s320/IMG_0122.jpg" width="320" /></a>While still laughing and waiting for nate to show up a big lifted F-350 saw us stranded and drove over to us. When he drove up to talk to us a huge wave came and rocked the car. About an inch of water flowed in on my side of the car putting my feet in a puddle. He drove up chuckling and said "I want to believe you just parked there, but i have a feeling you did something else." He was right, because i had done a very stupid thing. So at first he suggested climbing out of the car and going under the water to attach a tow strap to pull me out. Luckily before i climbed out he decided to drive up behind me and push me out with his bumper. So he drove around and done pushed me out. So 2 in the morning this guy saved me from my roommate Nate documenting my car stuck and flooded in the middle of a icy pond in the King Soopers parking lot. So now my car is at King Soopers drying out over night and hopefully i get it started in the morning and can drain the water out from inside my car.<br />
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I now can't sleep because I keep laughing to myself about the whole thing. And I wish this was the first time. Jeeps dont always have as much clearance as I think. That is my moral of today. I a few winters ago was in Rexburg, ID on a nice day going to Walmart. I got there and there was a small snow mound that i could have easily gone around, but i thought my jeep had more clearance. I floored it to make it over the snow mound. I ended up high centering myself on the only snow mound in the parking lot. It was a busy day, and people in big trucks kept driving by and taking pictures of me and my roommates trying to dig the snow out from under my car. We eventually got free. So tonight I learned 2 lessons. One my jeep is not lifted and can not drive under water. My second lesson is that puddles dont look big until you drive into them.Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-19930574555219152092012-01-23T21:15:00.000-07:002012-01-23T21:15:19.766-07:00Andy Griffeth fullfills me!<div style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a href="http://ts3.mm.bing.net/images/thumbnail.aspx?q=1595595561850&id=f31095a0c787a27e6b3fa808ed48b203" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://ts3.mm.bing.net/images/thumbnail.aspx?q=1595595561850&id=f31095a0c787a27e6b3fa808ed48b203" /></a>So today i got home from school and i was browsing channels to avoid my homework. There were movies and all kind of great things on, but my eyes saw the Andy Griffeth show was on. I can't explain in words the joy that overcame me. It was like...</div><div style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;">It was a 3 episodes and he my be the brightest Sheriff I have ever seen, and Barney is the opposite. I decided when i am rich one day i will buy all the seasons and then watch them all in one day! I also have to call in sick that day and buy lots of pop rocks and tv dinners, because i plan on that day being the best day of my life. </div><div style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;">The End</div><div style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br />
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</div>Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-12305425849615055702012-01-22T21:12:00.000-07:002012-01-22T21:12:05.134-07:00The tree started it!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiloh5ZH3HTZ0r3Yv3fRApTNUFOTWJOQ1gPANVe4snJRvQJ4TjVYsL6QuNCwxKGITrx6-4_u55AWROXj42hJurCeF0_Pyxkm5IkW26doJtnLamr9_JD2EkMxmf2WsTgrM5C6Yrxxmu_1rzR/s1600/dating-a-nerdy-girl.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiloh5ZH3HTZ0r3Yv3fRApTNUFOTWJOQ1gPANVe4snJRvQJ4TjVYsL6QuNCwxKGITrx6-4_u55AWROXj42hJurCeF0_Pyxkm5IkW26doJtnLamr9_JD2EkMxmf2WsTgrM5C6Yrxxmu_1rzR/s320/dating-a-nerdy-girl.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
I haven't written this semester yet, and so I figured It might be good to get back on the horse. I have been getting on the horse again for the last, i don't know how many, blogs which means that i am bad at writing frequently. This has turned into the time I had a journal on my mission and i started out as a daily journal and turned into a 6 month summary. So here i am in the Arpad my new place, which is a bachelor pad for those who struggle with dating. This holds true for me and my roommates. Actually it is just two of us since Dallon is in bliss with his Ms, and Robert is kinda engaged and so things are looking kinda successful for him. I am challenged, but i will make it like the little train that could. I am going to ask out a girl this semester as a goal of mine and i have someone who is going to set me up on a date. Also i have decided that i am a dating guru and that i possess all wisdom in relation to relationships. I have the perfect solution to every situation. I am pretty sure i could convince a squirrel to like an elephant.<br />
A side note is that i am kinda addicted to candy and lemonade which is unexpected.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhco_UxU5h6PO5vNem5JRWZLZRUCAkpEHtEnddIuRU0Un20wiTF3HPTq3KuzZ4NICIDH42Gy7cA52GRLQcoEMKOUWGNIh7K_hYWV6IVRKVKq9Vmgyudhyphenhyphennm4zWjsOudnyxO3uijogaNDe1e/s1600/tree.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhco_UxU5h6PO5vNem5JRWZLZRUCAkpEHtEnddIuRU0Un20wiTF3HPTq3KuzZ4NICIDH42Gy7cA52GRLQcoEMKOUWGNIh7K_hYWV6IVRKVKq9Vmgyudhyphenhyphennm4zWjsOudnyxO3uijogaNDe1e/s1600/tree.jpg" /></a>Also i ran into a tree on my skis. I felt like i was a good skier, but i straight shotted a stretch in the trees and then i was going to fast when i saw a tree right in front of me. I laid back so i wouldn't hit it with my whole body, and it hit me in the thigh. I got the worst dead leg of my life and my skis came off in the whip lash around the tree. I skied like 4 more runs, but i was skiing like a rookie and my pride couldn't take it, and it kinda hurt. I got home, but i was walking like I had 1 and a half legs. Dallon has owned a walker for old people for semesters. I would always ask him why he had it and carried it with him everywhere. He always answered by saying, "you never know when you might need a walker." Go figure; he was right!<br />
p.s. if you think i look bad, you should see the tree! that is why you shouldn't start fights you cant win.Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-44554926669358973992011-12-10T02:52:00.001-07:002011-12-10T03:00:00.769-07:00Should I raise my Hand?<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #434bc6; color: white;">There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.</span>Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-28264750310215839612011-11-30T00:49:00.000-07:002011-11-30T00:49:11.194-07:00Guilty Laughter! good or bad for the soul?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjH7zdu5DUSEMrKNPLDEQT0yeO06kvgFSKwJRqHfC8ys8iXVwNIwkZVugCT4IRmYExRfLH7Cjf_lPOGWV_CiduT66CYEI4Y0E4ASWhDbsDWML7YfV4Eu1fFvAa7Q7E5_r1EEEKb2h_a5BcW/s1600/no+eye+dog.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjH7zdu5DUSEMrKNPLDEQT0yeO06kvgFSKwJRqHfC8ys8iXVwNIwkZVugCT4IRmYExRfLH7Cjf_lPOGWV_CiduT66CYEI4Y0E4ASWhDbsDWML7YfV4Eu1fFvAa7Q7E5_r1EEEKb2h_a5BcW/s1600/no+eye+dog.jpg" /></a></div>So i just remembered a moment in life worth recounting. I was mowing this guys lawn who had two blind dogs. How you get two blind dogs is sketchy. But they were both blind. At first i just thought they walked funny and had dark eyes. They would walk like they were drunk. But while i was mowing, they started trying to run away from the mower and they were running into the playground equipment and bushes. And you know those moments where you laugh for a bit then stop because you feel bad for laughing, but then you repeat this every time it happens. This was totally one of those moments. It was so funny. I therefore feel it would be the best job to take care of blind animals. Cuz everyday you could wake up and laugh about something. Although I would probably become more sinister over time. I just think blind birds and cows and kangaroos might be really funny. I do feel bad about it though.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGF_L-9QwmSAMhNRjyr-M98ojou7V4SzyPDD1fLXBKh5hac3DeyqTyhnZGPtNIQQb5gr_cdzBYlnI4O3f6K6VU5QFkryXRgIpo_c5adzGBPh7ZBzDgF4fmrze8dV7hUSBnWhCavVNvimVr/s1600/images.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGF_L-9QwmSAMhNRjyr-M98ojou7V4SzyPDD1fLXBKh5hac3DeyqTyhnZGPtNIQQb5gr_cdzBYlnI4O3f6K6VU5QFkryXRgIpo_c5adzGBPh7ZBzDgF4fmrze8dV7hUSBnWhCavVNvimVr/s1600/images.jpg" /></a>I went to the special Olympics to help out. And i can say that there are special needs people that would make me look special if i challenged them, because they were so good. I was helping out with volleyball though and there was a guy that looked identical to Mr. Burns from the Simpsons and he didn't move a muscle the entire game. He would blink when the ball would hit him, but he was a statue stuck in bump mode. This was another moment where i laughed and i shouldn't have, but I cant help it at times. So i guess there are moments like these where we laugh, like when i guy falls out of his chair or slips on jello. We laugh and i guess even though we feel bad about it lots, it isn't so bad to laugh in the end because life is about joy and laughter.<br />
So i am not saying to go laugh at special people or painful moments all the time, but when you naturally cant hold back, just let the moment happen.<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizOVYjC7SaP4OAmMvpD_SJ_np31MzV3XLz4_SyWwh3ybUXyTTMDxkOYwG5jv2hSKsqK9-QZzZYrQgPmGkNZIw3DYT4yltvFPCvGEewJzVK7-YkcJfmrMQxaC7wKRMD-P28b9zXd4Lomh9M/s1600/blind+ape.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizOVYjC7SaP4OAmMvpD_SJ_np31MzV3XLz4_SyWwh3ybUXyTTMDxkOYwG5jv2hSKsqK9-QZzZYrQgPmGkNZIw3DYT4yltvFPCvGEewJzVK7-YkcJfmrMQxaC7wKRMD-P28b9zXd4Lomh9M/s1600/blind+ape.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I ate bad bananas!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>I am right now writing this late and i don't know why. I do thank all who read this. You are all my favorite people. And now i have hw i have been putting off and juice to drink. I have some chips with out salsa that need to be chewed on. But you all who read this are my inspiration for continuing. So i shall never give up and never surrender.Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-84323784846487530032011-11-20T13:05:00.001-07:002011-11-20T13:06:22.612-07:00Sunday Sunday, not Monday Monday<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_NACJvjCalQShZlSICu8eOEoz7FhyFIze-bJbtBHGfe2Mtiy-z-J3pVeGI55dmr0wjhGB1hci1y5Zj3o3dmg4x3VR1yZsDKPwKKq6zvt697AmsfNv4eoFtR-5iR-HahyphenhyphenoUDb9XrvMVYdB/s1600/cube.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_NACJvjCalQShZlSICu8eOEoz7FhyFIze-bJbtBHGfe2Mtiy-z-J3pVeGI55dmr0wjhGB1hci1y5Zj3o3dmg4x3VR1yZsDKPwKKq6zvt697AmsfNv4eoFtR-5iR-HahyphenhyphenoUDb9XrvMVYdB/s200/cube.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>There is nothing like waking up an blogging in the morning. I am awake and alert and weird thoughts come to mind. Like i was just thinking of when laugh when texting. I always laugh the same time which in not always accurate. I go haha, but never ha because that has a different meaning and never hahahahaha for who knows the reason. Maybe i feel that is to much laughing for a text or something.<br />
However i have great news! I finally did my 5x5 rubix cube. I always got stuck at the same part and i could figure out how to get past it. However is just clicked to me yesterday what i needed to do. It was super hard since you have to do a more that manipulates 3 surfaces and they all have to complete on another and go in all at the same time. It was a jump up and down and laugh like a giddy boy moment.<br />
Besides that epic moment, i had the privilege of going to the Warren Miller film yesterday with some die-hards and it was amazing. I want to ski so bad now. I drive by a house and I think "I would love to jump off that."<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOPDGInTOr25HKuwVC2rAaGMdCLJpGERFXoyumNdTSsCw3DgfKuIxSA-UXtnHAKGY6d3HShTBeCwCJ6uS_mnplRluPPyivWr5N8_qdp6otvWXeDItpa9DFC0ek7mrIEPPlzmpGASe2y2iI/s1600/miller.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOPDGInTOr25HKuwVC2rAaGMdCLJpGERFXoyumNdTSsCw3DgfKuIxSA-UXtnHAKGY6d3HShTBeCwCJ6uS_mnplRluPPyivWr5N8_qdp6otvWXeDItpa9DFC0ek7mrIEPPlzmpGASe2y2iI/s320/miller.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Then i went to my friend Katie's place and 4 of us drank a cup of Jello through a straw and it ended up being hilarious. The noises were so funny. Afterwards my stomach was sore from laughing and my mouth from sucking.<br />
So yesterday was a day to never be forgotten. Then today I am blogging, which is interesting. Whenever i tell someone i am blogging or that i have a blog i get looked at strange. People always sound so surprised and I don't know if that is because I am a guy and I am blogging, because it does tend to be more of a girl activity. It is like being a guy and saying you sow or get your nails done. Which i like to go to a friends house here at school on Sundays and get my manicure and then I paint their fingernails. Is it gay? Maybe a little, but i am just that solid in my masculinity and I make up for it by burping and having hairy legs. I also think people might be surprised I blog because i don't seem like the type. I think most people think of blogs as being about clothes, fashion and other art stuff. I am not artistic and so that is understandable. One day it will all make sense.<br />
I personally like to blog to just feel like i have a creative side and so i can talk about weird things.<br />
OK i need to go to church. peace out homies.Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-61906061330049420002011-11-19T18:08:00.000-07:002011-11-19T18:08:33.470-07:00Become the Miracle<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/eOd7QaDmBEM?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>This video i saw the other night and it was an eye opener. I need to be kinder and never say anything bad about anyone. No one should ever have to feel hated or not loved, no one should ever feel lonely. I am going to become the miracle.Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-41270061668232208742011-11-19T17:47:00.000-07:002011-11-19T17:47:12.381-07:00Defining "my one true love"<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzhEgce3xBev_PYRl4xuTKA_gX0_IV_wuhvJ8Xb6Pf2zX6AsZMvBnqnyMSaxWC4W_pp3LrY2NGXXHmeoyrlGUpoWcVnHvt1MPjUwz8u7btEBxH81w7mSQvYrY_dnymp7NUm356HI7pY7bD/s1600/fing+love.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzhEgce3xBev_PYRl4xuTKA_gX0_IV_wuhvJ8Xb6Pf2zX6AsZMvBnqnyMSaxWC4W_pp3LrY2NGXXHmeoyrlGUpoWcVnHvt1MPjUwz8u7btEBxH81w7mSQvYrY_dnymp7NUm356HI7pY7bD/s1600/fing+love.jpg" /></a></div>I am in one of those thoughtful moods. I just hurt someone i think due to not dating them. However here are my thoughts on dating.<br />
I am now almost 25 years old and have gone on probably around 100 first dates now. I tried to count once and got lost in the 50s. The number not the decade. Anyways so I feel like for each individual we formulate our own definitions. For example if you ask someone to define faith as completely as they can, then they will define it as they have come to understand it through personal experience and background. For this reason a catholic or an evangelist, or a member of the church would all have very different definitions of faith, but even within those faiths everyone's definition will differ slightly.<br />
I see dating a similar thing. I to be honest am looking for the girl i want to spend the rest of eternity with, a woman who falls under the definition of a wife. I have dating so many unique girls, each with amazing attributes and personalities. I could have probably married many of them, but after so many dates i refine my definition of the term "my wife" and not "wife" in general.<br />
I have a special mold and not ever girl fits that mold perfectly. "My wife" needs to be specific to me and I to her. She will have a specific definition, one that is already mostly complete, but wont be completed fully until the day i meet her. In that day i will have the definition for a girl that is perfect for me.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifJlTdD0c7gPIuJbwnrzmdIgz62FW0u33ybltWLZcT0NBlFpvkm0WOyAc1Ttx-niGcH2coFXfihhpahEcrenzam26-uUtgB16M9r3I2oIUQQzjQYkB9T_zKyAYHzDOLNs2k03ZQLFTjP-U/s1600/hug+tear.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifJlTdD0c7gPIuJbwnrzmdIgz62FW0u33ybltWLZcT0NBlFpvkm0WOyAc1Ttx-niGcH2coFXfihhpahEcrenzam26-uUtgB16M9r3I2oIUQQzjQYkB9T_zKyAYHzDOLNs2k03ZQLFTjP-U/s1600/hug+tear.jpg" /></a>I do want to get married and be special and be the one and only to someone forever. And i want them to feel the same way. I asked my dad once why it always seems that one person is more invested then the other in a relationship. He told me that it is always that way, until the day you meet the one who completes you. I think there is so much truth in that. I dated a girl who for some reason I felt an incredible urge to show her i cared for her. It was a natural feeling to do everything and speak every love language to her. I ended up being more invested then her, but I hope to find a girl again that i feel that same way about. I loved who i was around her, because she made me a better person and i was selfless.<br />
Another feeling that tends to be there or not is the feeling of emotional safety. It is one thing to feel physically safe or even spiritually safe around someone, because those are more evident forms of safety that can easily be seen if they are present or not by the way they act. If they keep curfew and dress standards at school then that is one sign that they are spiritually safe. If you can be around a person and they aren't physically aggressive and are forcing kisses on you, then you can trust them to be physically safe towards you. However emotional safety is just kind of a feeling that is there or not when you are around someone. I feel emotionally safe with all my family members and i feel i can share however i am feeling with them, and they will comfort me and will take how i am feeling seriously. I have dated a few girls that i have felt this same emotional safety towards. I can tell them anything even though i hardly know them. It is a rare thing, but this also has become part on my definition of my perfect girl.<br />
I know looks and being fit is important to me, and i know it is vain. However they are really just important in the beginning when i go to pursue a girl. With time in knowing a girl looks loose their importance and become less a priority. They are still important, but the list order changes as I know a girl longer. If they fit the definition of "My wife" they fit the later definition rather then the first definition. I don't know if that makes sense at all, but I have a different definition for how a perfect girl should be in the beginning when we first start dating, and then I only know how my list is suppose to change as i get to know the girl, and the expectations i have for her as part of the definition.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcQ4NgupG6mWbCV6HsHWiMNWJSFWd1gVnp2ywnTQhPPSICYOTc0xpP0pnTV4gwwbyyWVU75v2Bh1G4BM-9JynY5Af5LaAZUq1-K-V1QzoFUlHTcUZqC3sfIIBi1bP1WOAtbc07_T-jeKwr/s1600/tear.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcQ4NgupG6mWbCV6HsHWiMNWJSFWd1gVnp2ywnTQhPPSICYOTc0xpP0pnTV4gwwbyyWVU75v2Bh1G4BM-9JynY5Af5LaAZUq1-K-V1QzoFUlHTcUZqC3sfIIBi1bP1WOAtbc07_T-jeKwr/s1600/tear.jpg" /></a>So I only know my definition and most of the definition lies in the feelings i have in my heart when i am with the girl and the feeling i have towards her. So if a girl is more invested than me or if I don't feel the 100% emotional safety around someone, than i don't pursue it more. I feel this is my most appropriate way of searching without hurting people. I have to hurt girls and so at first sign of a different or off definition, then I call it off. I feel bad, but it is the best way i know about going about it. I am getting old though and i am still single and a faulty approach could be part of it. I know that I will meet her one day, and that i will be complete that day. Dating is definitely tough, but i guess in all becomes worth it in the end.Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-63163113204975294522011-10-20T18:25:00.000-06:002011-10-20T18:25:57.446-06:00Cookies Squirrels<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhQZVVWUwVcxczFs4L67J1iMJiadjPtzEp2dGdMidcWSmtTYWS5NNZVzEq4uULRJxZ2NBIXvH7oDz5EqMZxaQF4KFV9sLZnMbXTlxGAZnjQmuigZvlW_-pfBU88urqV-S_NyA_YRyYl0GV/s1600/burnt.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhQZVVWUwVcxczFs4L67J1iMJiadjPtzEp2dGdMidcWSmtTYWS5NNZVzEq4uULRJxZ2NBIXvH7oDz5EqMZxaQF4KFV9sLZnMbXTlxGAZnjQmuigZvlW_-pfBU88urqV-S_NyA_YRyYl0GV/s1600/burnt.jpg" /></a></div>So I met a man who met a girl who know a sister of a brother who married his best friends cousin who knows the first man, who knows me. I am popular like this. People know me through people. I lately have been struggling to meet new people. I decided that I am afraid of being afraid and therefore avoid situations that might have fear, like talking to cute girls. That was unrelated.<br />
So here is the deal. I burnt some cookies that I made and Rexburg just made me mad, because of the lack of birds and squirrels. I never see them here and I miss them. I wanted to feed them my burnt cookies, but if i just set them out on the front step like I was tempted, then they would just sit there. I dont want to take the plate out to the dumpster and I don't want it to stink up the trash. This is the reason for being angry right now.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCjTYpT5S0S7m9D4L8R_pnNqkOyvsws21vYzCbFvngOic8Hk-MHIkja2NXY3NYQGfvcxfaHjm0ekUILt0PfXnUrM4n3x4oKLq9NI5BLrXbr-k65RcvlQke0UTIiBhXN3ECpJ9vsnFsKKKE/s1600/pizza7-718404.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCjTYpT5S0S7m9D4L8R_pnNqkOyvsws21vYzCbFvngOic8Hk-MHIkja2NXY3NYQGfvcxfaHjm0ekUILt0PfXnUrM4n3x4oKLq9NI5BLrXbr-k65RcvlQke0UTIiBhXN3ECpJ9vsnFsKKKE/s320/pizza7-718404.jpg" width="320" /></a>Where are the freaking animals? Even a coyote would eat them i think, but since there are no squirrels, there are no other animal predators. So my burnt cookies sadly go into the trash, because the duck pond is too far to travel for 6 burnt cookies. I feel so sad, and I want to now catch a squirrel and breed them till they become numerous, and then I will breed coyotes. I just don't have breeding ground from such a large endeavor like re-population of squirrels.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>All in all the cookies went to waste and Rexburg remains a barren land of color and animals. Just lots of wind remains to chill this thought even more in my mind.Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-10944965344351844412011-10-20T01:10:00.000-06:002011-10-20T01:10:43.150-06:00WII likes GirlsI am very tired right now. I am watching some retarded show where people keep beating each other up and smoking stuff. Justin Timerlake is in it i think, but the sound is off and I am just semi watching it for no reason. It makes no sense with the sound off. I don't know how deft people do it, because it is confusing. Anyways tonight I did some dancing game on the WII and I decided that I am terrible at it. I was like delayed on everything. The hard part about the game is only partly the dancing. Mostly however it is seeing to words OK or good and then seeing Awesome on the next persons screen. You can be getting OKs while the person next to you gets awesome and great. It is anything but a self esteem boost and I think it is discriminatory, because it seems to like girl dancers more than guy dancers. Well i am super tired and my mind is like going to sleep and into hibernation before my laptop does and that is just weird. LazersBrett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-29979782233572046032011-10-17T10:41:00.000-06:002011-10-17T10:41:41.474-06:00Kung Fu with a slice of wonderbread!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiU1JIHTis7G3eWeax4z78HKSvzdskp-vVuo479P6Uivk3xI1KaPHAf0jxZ3lRCldA9B5stT-y7zfBJl7wVfc-6xtmLHpXJy77tWp3hursUPZ2vBr8Cm_PCwBUA93310LfjKeWSX6BEiZBV/s1600/baby+fu.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiU1JIHTis7G3eWeax4z78HKSvzdskp-vVuo479P6Uivk3xI1KaPHAf0jxZ3lRCldA9B5stT-y7zfBJl7wVfc-6xtmLHpXJy77tWp3hursUPZ2vBr8Cm_PCwBUA93310LfjKeWSX6BEiZBV/s320/baby+fu.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>I have very limited battery and so I am limited in what i can say. I was just wondering why all Chinese people do martial arts. I believe it might be to their gymnastics programs in kindergarten or their more elaborate school yard fights. Perhaps their gym classes are just fighting/dancing lessons, because this would explain their natural ability to do hip-hop too. Then there is the possibility that they are drawn to it, like white kids are to rodeos and video games, like Brazilians to soccer, like Mexicans to pinatas, like nerds to computers. They also might have the genetic coding to make them more agile and reflexive. I want to see an Asian goalie, because this could possibly set all suspicions aside. Their bone structure alone is strengthened to karate chop boards.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-Hr9mzCC0BBunkVStinfwUceVnC5gHtYo7CrBer1742jtZGhzxGZCCemFYciuXgkpm6_O_hcNipcYJTXobzx4VLakhyur_eXOKmjz8OaJp_PatcnImWw17vMewmNVlN5aSBB_cSfyMrYM/s1600/jack-black-kung-fu.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="146" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-Hr9mzCC0BBunkVStinfwUceVnC5gHtYo7CrBer1742jtZGhzxGZCCemFYciuXgkpm6_O_hcNipcYJTXobzx4VLakhyur_eXOKmjz8OaJp_PatcnImWw17vMewmNVlN5aSBB_cSfyMrYM/s200/jack-black-kung-fu.jpg" width="200" /></a>So I wonder if you made a Asian black person if they would be invincible. Breed The Rock with Jet Lees offspring and you get a miracle baby. Then if they made a sandwich it would be made with Wonder bread. Oh and a side not is that i love to put high-fins in words, but they didn't want one in Wonder bread. Well that is my thoughts on kung fu and pandas are also naturals due to their Asian heredity.<br />
The EndBrett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-78336051972362907162011-10-16T12:40:00.001-06:002011-10-16T12:42:00.157-06:00Selective-Seinfeldatosis<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTYUNpDRIS9rWBU1is-6Bml8UF0z_GENmMUHvo83mrnDy8ZvtvS8ZXXc15jYdU3MF9hxhmCNhZ8rt6z_J0Fp8CBci9i0q2WuYkir2OfAmIwHZviKBj0jJzEZd7AKd3k2RXnaObcbIHP8zp/s1600/tumblr_lka2mc7beE1qj9qhto1_500.gif" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="152" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTYUNpDRIS9rWBU1is-6Bml8UF0z_GENmMUHvo83mrnDy8ZvtvS8ZXXc15jYdU3MF9hxhmCNhZ8rt6z_J0Fp8CBci9i0q2WuYkir2OfAmIwHZviKBj0jJzEZd7AKd3k2RXnaObcbIHP8zp/s320/tumblr_lka2mc7beE1qj9qhto1_500.gif" style="cursor: move;" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">click on this picture for a demo of this!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>So my last post was serious so i thought i would do a rambler. Funny thing is i am looking around at the living room at like bananas and wondering what to say.<br />
So Seinfeldatosis is a disease where you wont date or stop dating someone for ridiculous reasons. I have a variation of this disease called Selective-Seinfeldatosis. This is when you do the same thing, but in order to convince yourself not to like them for a completely unrelated reason. I will give examples, but don't be offended, because I choose not to date them first. For one I went on a date and the girl had a lazy eye and even though I had talked to her so many times before i had never noticed. So i spent the whole date confused as to whether or not she was looking at me or not. I could have gone in for a kiss thinking she was looking at me, but really she wasn't. So I went to hug her goodnight after a long date and she refused. So I decided the lazy eye thing was a deal breaker and that was that. So the disease usually comes into effect on selective terms.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxxcgpjFESpeuwDQO0mlwaxBaYsxLdVFGyhQnRT54SIGipFTGIwi4el8c2dkcZxXGT1D_a1CXKr7A5jZ0bgL4IBhlap0YXk7oL5MlmXjCoiZkmVU8MqT2jT6n-cmF5jBpZ8yTn6emVVkYa/s1600/seinfeld_cast.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxxcgpjFESpeuwDQO0mlwaxBaYsxLdVFGyhQnRT54SIGipFTGIwi4el8c2dkcZxXGT1D_a1CXKr7A5jZ0bgL4IBhlap0YXk7oL5MlmXjCoiZkmVU8MqT2jT6n-cmF5jBpZ8yTn6emVVkYa/s320/seinfeld_cast.jpg" width="293" /></a></div>However there was a girl i liked in high-school and so I sat behind her so i could flirt more. One day in class we were taking a test and he was leaning way forward and her shirt came up in the back, and a bush popped out. After catching glimpse a bush was burned in my mind and that ruined that. I have had selective-Seinfeldatosis. I have tons of examples ranging from hairiness to makeup. I once had a major crush on a girl and then at a ward breakfast saw her with no makeup and I was shocked speechless. This disease even enters personality. I stopped dating a girl because she was too mean a couple "days" each month(period.) Then another girl would always talk in ridiculous voices all the time and i am not sure what her real voice sounds like.<br />
So all this sounds super mean and I am not that way. I find tons of girls beautiful, but that may be a reason for still being single. And I know everyone has their moments of these symptoms. And for that I am self conscious about a mole on my left leg or about my tooth that sits crooked. I also have a calac in my hair that inhibits me from doing a fohawk. I have big gaps between my big toes and my toes are very webbed. These are just a few of my own, but i embrace them. I have a buddy who trims his eyebrows and armpit hairs. That was unrelated. But these are my thoughts. Finding a deal breaker is my best way of getting over a girl that I like or that i might like.<br />
The end and no hating.Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-83879614850479427022011-10-16T11:40:00.000-06:002011-10-16T11:40:14.235-06:00More Rice Crispee People.<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPFLFjJTm-3oz56cnYBAizQ30w8A-JAqGNl0crDR58XlhWoB2khpS7S5dWp8XL6OOyECL9V6Gv0t32ilu4ujgliE985AbCm-u8xCk44pUEcki1-2QdSEQozLqCCMfg0sNT9WT9ZDEVL93m/s1600/Dwayne-Rock-Johnson-Vin-Diesel-Fast-Five.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPFLFjJTm-3oz56cnYBAizQ30w8A-JAqGNl0crDR58XlhWoB2khpS7S5dWp8XL6OOyECL9V6Gv0t32ilu4ujgliE985AbCm-u8xCk44pUEcki1-2QdSEQozLqCCMfg0sNT9WT9ZDEVL93m/s320/Dwayne-Rock-Johnson-Vin-Diesel-Fast-Five.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Rock uses body lotion. He doesn't sweat.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Wow it is Sunday morning, and what is loco is what i saw this morning. When I looked out the window, what did I see, but popcorn popping on the apricot tree. I could take a handful and make a treat, a popcorn ball that would probably smell like popcorn. Really it wasn't buttered or carameled. Then even if it was we would be dealing with ants and bugs. I like my pop secret the most, because I can hide with it and it wont turn me in or give away my hiding spot. It is a discrete snack. However it like all popcorn, says it is buttered. Some say they are super buttered, but they are the same as the normal buttered. So I would prefer it just to come with like 2 sticks of butter in each box and let me be the quantity control police.<br />
Anyways I have no idea where popcorn cam from, but last night I watch the action movie for men, "Fast Five." I freaking love this movie for its ridiculous action and funny scenes. I always wonder those things like, "who would win in a fight between Jason Bourn or James Bond. So fast five allowed me to finally know who would win in a warehouse fight between The ROCK or Vin Deisel. Vin Deisel did, because he is the Pacifier, the Ridick, the triple x. It was a MNO a "mens night out" last night.<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEib85QBUfbhCaEha4PCI_H4i2TO6vuGP5vYiDaVEED9hCR2aHTDnGkp9vynv6DGu7KLE5N-pnXlCzx5zY-41w91Et-4BdA0EKXBSIdXzBZezC98ehYQwO9bN7ei9hG1Xl6Taw0mai8DrekN/s1600/shoe.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEib85QBUfbhCaEha4PCI_H4i2TO6vuGP5vYiDaVEED9hCR2aHTDnGkp9vynv6DGu7KLE5N-pnXlCzx5zY-41w91Et-4BdA0EKXBSIdXzBZezC98ehYQwO9bN7ei9hG1Xl6Taw0mai8DrekN/s320/shoe.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">nothing like a gigantic rice crispee shoe</td></tr>
</tbody></table>This brings me to my next thought, I need guy friends. So girls are fun, but there are so many flaky ones that don't put forth any effort. I dont want cornbread friends, I want me some good old Rice Crispies. They are sweet, but can be tough too. And no matter what stretching goes on, they come back together. They can be separate or easily become one again. And best of all they are sticky fun. I have guy friends back home that are rice crispee friends, but i have no guy friends like that here. There is no man law here. I meet cool guys and then they get girls. So I decided that i need to find dateless friends.<br />
The young women's president for the church came here and told the girls to stop hanging out. She told them to turn us guys down unless we call and ask them on a date. So things are really getting tough here. And this is my reason for needing bros. But i want guys that are crazy and will go nuts. We went to a party the other night, and out of the 200 people there, our group of 5 was by far the craziest. People were coming over just to watch the show. Rexburg needs more wild childs.<br />
And I want to thank all my friends that read these. It is cool to have friends like all of you. I feel like the luckiest guy at times, because I have some very loyal and loving friends and I cant thank you all enough for your awesomeness.Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-73518992338170959462011-10-07T15:33:00.000-06:002011-10-07T15:33:28.456-06:00Gum for my Tum!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzga62AQgbhuBUPgJyhl74orhILy6OZfcK0QX2YR28pGYV4RbKtTrJhyphenhyphen184lU4GZ5g3aiZ_LYub5UO8PA2okL_LIcv2XT7xX3qDSsOKsFBYgV3dov1hBPZTlxI-7lXGpDoOM-MBEnmDi8J/s1600/fork.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzga62AQgbhuBUPgJyhl74orhILy6OZfcK0QX2YR28pGYV4RbKtTrJhyphenhyphen184lU4GZ5g3aiZ_LYub5UO8PA2okL_LIcv2XT7xX3qDSsOKsFBYgV3dov1hBPZTlxI-7lXGpDoOM-MBEnmDi8J/s200/fork.jpg" width="159" /></a>Home-slice slicing! That is the phrase i just made up for hanging with my home-slices, which are rad people. An example of this is when the ninja turtle would hang out with April O'neil or with Casey Jones. So that is what i am doing right now in the library.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBkEAku3OtZ2r7p_vxd7wqh2K8U5YO8UlrMFfpytBC1vxDgDSkz91jItQT71rETFNrO7oqoN_QBKW0GOgbmZBDnWdJV_Z5L7QfPxNe2PbDPep7atGV5bFNAcqGryOAzz78k2WxBbQGuxhz/s1600/pile+of+gum.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBkEAku3OtZ2r7p_vxd7wqh2K8U5YO8UlrMFfpytBC1vxDgDSkz91jItQT71rETFNrO7oqoN_QBKW0GOgbmZBDnWdJV_Z5L7QfPxNe2PbDPep7atGV5bFNAcqGryOAzz78k2WxBbQGuxhz/s1600/pile+of+gum.jpg" /></a>I would have gone home since it is a Friday, but they said if i waited an hour they would drive me home and so here i am wasting time. I also have a headache from chewing a piece of gum too long. Now my jar is tired as well. I have been chewing gum so i don't fall asleep in classes, but i am a bit worried since i am too lazy to find a trash can most of the time and so i just swallow it. I wonder now how much gum is just chilling in my stomach. If each piece sticks around for 7 days, then i might have a whole pack in there now. That means i might have a snowball size ball of gum in my stomach.<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJRUZYAbVNgJR5jh8RIn9hFWRlgw6lPoljPbX4PkOcVdKwpoJfl63bqyVRxEdpRIuiZLeKJ238xGS092x4_7B6l1sXbNPWhjK0JSaWduyS4agosYoUXwf73WcjYkiSi6R9sdbL1E-hDA4u/s1600/alligator.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJRUZYAbVNgJR5jh8RIn9hFWRlgw6lPoljPbX4PkOcVdKwpoJfl63bqyVRxEdpRIuiZLeKJ238xGS092x4_7B6l1sXbNPWhjK0JSaWduyS4agosYoUXwf73WcjYkiSi6R9sdbL1E-hDA4u/s1600/alligator.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">a gum alligator. cliche'</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
The EndBrett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-87551071974046796862011-09-30T11:03:00.000-06:002011-09-30T11:03:31.673-06:00I am distracted by the distracted! Ironic<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvz1Je5sZIPoHOCgEVC8TDaYspRzsQHqJFKPmlNiEczn9X3ikNIT18cyWB7vCTyQQyGc_J1mlZbIvcFss8X8ODfPOsqSXpNZUF_XfZcfNRMiEq2nEEJnkGRyLr9PGEsS3SmYGTgNyd8jmu/s1600/the-cosby-show.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvz1Je5sZIPoHOCgEVC8TDaYspRzsQHqJFKPmlNiEczn9X3ikNIT18cyWB7vCTyQQyGc_J1mlZbIvcFss8X8ODfPOsqSXpNZUF_XfZcfNRMiEq2nEEJnkGRyLr9PGEsS3SmYGTgNyd8jmu/s320/the-cosby-show.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>So i am quietly chilling at the library. There is a girl in front of me sitting at a computer desk, with her laptop on the keyboard of the school keyboard and it is in front of the school monitor. She is strange and to top it off she is watching "The Crosby Show". She also took her shoes off, which is cool because at least she has good taste in socks. But she has her homework out, with obviously no intention of touching it since she is watching Crosby re-runs. I decided to not even get my homework out since at the moment I have no desire to study. I have been in weekend mode since i woke up.<br />
Also there is a kid who is using a way higher decibel amount that should be used in a library and he has sparkles on his shirt.<br />
Another kid has his foot on the desk and his laptop on his lap. It is so distracting and he has new balance. Which is a dumb name for a shoe since new balance is not something I am looking for. It is not like i was walking to school today and almost tipped over and thought to myself, "I wish i had new balance, because my old balance is getting old and unstable." And if someone does have trouble, I doubt people are going to buy those and think, "Now i wont fall over, and now i am going to unicycle." Just saying that it doesn't work like that. I am wearing plaid shoes and they make me feel like i am having a party, but i like them most because they slide on tile.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgx2q8fkburmuRrdoikCqWKhsGTDII5bUl6F3gppNnMSNgUoFbwtqx34XF4IBLsINXv3Ut_ZvrgrEYjWWq0JyCRBAWXRQs8meSnnwH0-HwtoWKiPfy41yA4zpNaw_1Y53t9RQIxeVicGDeU/s1600/sneaker.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="142" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgx2q8fkburmuRrdoikCqWKhsGTDII5bUl6F3gppNnMSNgUoFbwtqx34XF4IBLsINXv3Ut_ZvrgrEYjWWq0JyCRBAWXRQs8meSnnwH0-HwtoWKiPfy41yA4zpNaw_1Y53t9RQIxeVicGDeU/s320/sneaker.jpg" width="320" /></a>I need to go because I think the kid next to me is leering and might find out that I am people watching, because i keep glancing at his screen and then typing stuff. I think he is slightly paranoid. I love some of you and like some of you, and would even hug the strangers who are reading this, because obviously you are bored and for that reason you need a hug. They also sell them at most grocery stores next to snickers and kisses. Snickers usually don't boost moral btw.<br />
adios muchachos.Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-22956714857200768482011-09-30T01:38:00.000-06:002011-09-30T01:38:47.585-06:00OK Cupid is my pond<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCX_r1nf6VwbafHHV5F3m7O5sMzDxZ2IvrTBTWpSpbZ5N6Wa-YkrniRM3DiSJJsP3vy9_OYrEmKYp_iCWQfAuDKlEsfiX4N3_ycIMxxL5C1UmfejcrZoDVVAe9knBjqEjnZrTRkbg0mD3T/s1600/matrix.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="165" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCX_r1nf6VwbafHHV5F3m7O5sMzDxZ2IvrTBTWpSpbZ5N6Wa-YkrniRM3DiSJJsP3vy9_OYrEmKYp_iCWQfAuDKlEsfiX4N3_ycIMxxL5C1UmfejcrZoDVVAe9knBjqEjnZrTRkbg0mD3T/s200/matrix.jpg" width="200" /></a>So I am on a dating site! And it is a blast. People ask me why i have one and i say for fun, but then they look confused as if fun and dating sites dont go together. Flash, with news before it, (newsflash) they do. I went out with a black girl off of it and had a sweet time, and it was partly due to the fact i got candy on my frozen yogurt. And the sour worms and sweedish fish get wicked hard, and IDK why that is. But i have had wicked tall, small, thick, thin and middleish write me and it is cool, but what makes it fun is what you can write them.<br />
I recently wrote this to a girl was paired with me because of my criteria. Her status said she was afraid of marriage and said she was looking for a non-creeper. I wrote her this:<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjb4gpwwme3pofddxJ7xX88zPRniLDJWhtxsOsQQXsAKzmJO-JCuviY4Ro-qMmOXV1luxYBv2gA2Gf275575Z1rmQHoj3pymF5IXwSYDEzHUVVjeK4KidFbfYS2LDr-7XF_5LgbPpXiTHqq/s1600/shock.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="228" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjb4gpwwme3pofddxJ7xX88zPRniLDJWhtxsOsQQXsAKzmJO-JCuviY4Ro-qMmOXV1luxYBv2gA2Gf275575Z1rmQHoj3pymF5IXwSYDEzHUVVjeK4KidFbfYS2LDr-7XF_5LgbPpXiTHqq/s320/shock.jpg" width="320" /></a>"So it is too soon to ask you to marry me and I know you wouldnt from your profile. Which leaves me to eating scooby doo fruit snacks, which are awesome, and watching re-runs of Bonanza. Or you can just say hi and i will say hi back, then you can say hi again, and then we might get into quality conversations about saving whales and how we feel when we have to to watch scary movies alone. This sounds so weird and it is, but i am not. I am more just hoping you read all this and I imagine you scratching your head because you are confused and not because you have a dry scalp. I am like the toy in a cracker jack box. It is now up to you if you want to open the box and find me. I am a fun surprise. Ttyl and enjoy the caramel corn."<br />
So will she write me? I doubt it. Am i a creeper? I probably am. Is it fun weirding people out? Why not? I do it every day and It is who I am. Why am i not married? Go figure (shrug) {I just shrugged}.<br />
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Love Bretty :-)Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1335949829568746013.post-15851319995769779012011-09-20T01:05:00.000-06:002011-09-20T01:05:52.507-06:00Thor is not my name:-(So i started a while back writing a new post, but woe and behold a meteor struck my house and made it impossible to post it. Bad timing? So i went to the crash sight and no aliens:-( there was a knife stuck in a rock in the center, but i couldnt pull it out. My parents did not name me Thor or Author and so i am holding my parents accountable for my lack of becoming really cool and a hero. So i came home and ate a grapefruit and then some grape nuts and then some raisins.<br />
Now days later after days of soldering wires my computer is fixed and I am posting my tall tale. It is a tall tale solely because i am tall, not because it is not true. Although I didnt not say it was not true. I should not not tell the truth. I lied and i feel guilty.<br />
So i am going to bed, but i wanted to say hi to all of you invisible people and I am going to go brush my teeth with some minty Colgate. peace out.Brett Beutlerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01894561216716555630noreply@blogger.com1